isleofavalon | getting used to it, lit the fuse to it

Entry tags:

getting used to it, lit the fuse to it

🧙 WHO: Zuko & Co. (open to all)
⚔️️ WHAT: Sync or Swim TDM prompts: meditating, synchronized magic practice, brooding at bonfire
🕒 WHEN: February ???^th
🗺️ WHERE: Meditation area
⚠️ WARNINGS: Everything's kosher!

A. We Succeed Together

[ Zuko's not new to meditation. He's diligently forced himself into peaceful mindfulness — cuz that's how his mind works. With everything Zuko's been through, and his latent anger issues, despite whatever progress he's made, meditation comes hard for him — which is exactly why he meditates. By now, after years of using meditation to help bolster his firebending (or so he saw it at the time; in fact in hindsight, it was his uncle's sneaky way to encourage him to heal his traumatized young soul), Zuko's become a pro. Find him in his meditation tent, legs crossed, back straight, hands laid against his knees comfortably, as if he's been in this position for quite some time now. He has been; for hours. He has enough on his mind to work through since being in Avalon that several hours of meditation on end is... due.

Meditation and connection with others is different. He is curious about combining magics. He likes taking advantage of the nice environment in the tents, the familiar smell of incense, the warm steamy air a firebender loves most, a deep silence filling the tent most of the times, but occasionally, if he's in a more wistful way in his meditating at the moment, the sound of a somber, strange-sounding instrument drifts softly through the air. He enjoys the moments when no one comes in his for a while, but when people do, he's trying to be more forthcoming than usual, wanting to succeed at the magic training task... but forthcoming doesn't necessarily mean friendly. He's still a stick-in-the-mud. He'll take shots and play 20 questions with his partners without hesitation, but don't expect him to act happy about it. That's not the jive in this tent, okay.

However, once they've built more trust perhaps, a more vulnerable, awkward side of Zuko shows when trying to dance together. He's agile and nimble, with good footwork and coordination, but he's stiff and nervous dancing the whole time — no rhythm, no fun, no fluidity. He's going through the motions. There's no dancing in the Fire Nation. It's considered inelegant. And Zuko's least of all the type to cut a rug. But if it comes to a dancing emergency like this, he'll dance to save his life — cuz he did that once, y'know, danced with his friend to keep some dragons from eating them, then danced with the dragons... That has to count for something. ]

B. We Fail Apart
[ If it doesn't, and you end up trapped in the tent together... lord help you. You may both go blind. He's been here since shortly after dawn, so it could be literally any time of day, sun or moon. But if he doesn't loosen up with his dancing partners and open up more, he'll run into trouble for sure. Zuko's got a ton of secrets, and he's not keen to share them, so unsealing the tent is gonna take some time. Bodyswapping seems less intimidating than revealing certain things... But he has plenty of other secrets to divulge if it comes to it. ]

C. Loss and Gain
[ The bonfire is Zuko's scene, and he's had some peace of mind after all the meditating and magic-lacing all day. He's chewed over so much, revealed so much about himself, had a deeply pensive day, so it's left him rather quiet and ruminative, but still very much seeking company. He's struggling with some major feelings of loss and conflicts about connection since arriving in Avalon, his social life in shambles and yet absolutely blessed in other areas, his deep duality somehow always at play. He's gained old friends, lost new friends, been spirited away again... It's a lot. He's just come from another planet, apart from his home for half a year now, where he needed to depend on physical affection from others to survive, and that's very unnatural for the young fire prince, but it was easy to ask for it there, because everyone needed to touch, it was understood. Here... he doesn't know how to get so cozy with people like that easily; it's not his first inclination. He's been touch-starved for over five years now, even on that strange alien planet before he came to Avalon, but he's become more comfortable with it, enjoys it. Just doesn't know how to ask for it. He's fine without, as nice as it'd be, and it seems just as nice to simply sit beside someone. Conversation is welcome as well as silence. Just being near someone now seems... important.

He can't help but dwell on deeper, darker, lonelier thoughts, as he gazes into the flames. They burned colors he'd never seen but once — when dragons produced similarly rainbow flames, so hot and intense in a pillar of fire surrounding Zuko, overwhelming him to his very core. No other fires could ever compete. But this one was particularly entrancing, and he'll sit there for hours just staring at it until it's no more than embers. He's had a lot on his mind since coming here; more than usual, which is saying something. All this dwelling is definitely due; but good conversation, good company, good moods always make dwelling more productive. At the tail end of the night, as the embers die down, Zuko uncharacteristically catches one of the rainbow fireflies to make a wish. He tries to do it off away from what few other lingerers there are still, but wishing alone won't help wishes come true, whatever whim of a wish it was that he indulged. All good energy counts. ]

D. Wildcard!
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[ Hm, he supposes it's some sort of identity, so he just shrugs at Zuko's preference. ]

Fair enough. So, how're you feeling now? Trusting enough to talk instead of telling me to piss off, at least. That's a surprisingly good start! Consider me impressed~

That's the point, isn't it?

[ There's a pointedness to his tone as he says it, in fact, a bit hot, a bit weary. This isn't his strong suit. But he is trying. He'd never admit it, but it's nice to have it recognized, even if it seems slightly smarmy. ]

I like a challenge.

[ Did he answer his question? No. Zuko's not sure how he's feeling. Something's definitely hard to pin down about this guy. ]

...So is it my turn to ask a question, I guess?

[ It's the point, and however uncomfortable Zuko obviously is about the whole situation, here he is rising to the occasion with only that initial resistance. Even Karma would say it's impressive; it's not something he would have done, tending to withhold his trust until it's earned. ]

Eh... Nah, it's alright. I trust ya, so why don't we just get on with the ritual?

[ If he could get through this without answering anything honestly, that would be awesome. ]

You trust me just from that?! I barely told you anything. And you told me nothing! Why should I trust you so fast just because I gave you an honest answer to a nosy question?

[ Yup, if you thought you were making progress, guess again. He knows if you don't trust each other enough, you fuck up the ritual, and it fucks up bad. He's not the trusting type. He's just thick and doesn't realize how much he's revealing between the lines. The dismissal makes him bristle, not quite insulted, but taken aback, put off, maybe a little pissed off. It's not that easy with him, Karma. Nothing's easy with Zuko. ]

[ Zuko... It's okay, Karma isn't discouraged, he just laughs it off at how damned prickly this guy is. ]

What can I say? I'm just a naturally trusting guy~

[ nah ]

Since the problem's on your end... Ah, have you ever done a trust fall? Quickest way to build truth between two people!

A trust... fall?

[ No, clearly he's not. He never went to elementary school, never attended any preteen slumber parties, only made friends his age recently who gained his trust naturally — well, more or less... He and his uncle had never done trust falls. Iroh just actually would save his literal life; it'd've made the exercise a little less impactful if they'd tried... ]

[ Not everybody can save each others' lives as a trust building exercise, please, ]

Sure! You close your eyes and let yourself fall backwards, trusting the other person standing behind you to not let you hit the ground. Sort of like... trusting your safety to them!

[ He opens his arms wide! If anything, Karma is tall. ]

...Is this a game for kids? Seriously?

[ Clearly, he doesn't trust his safety to Karma or else he wouldn't object and hesitate. This kid isn't making anything easy, is he? ]

Yep! How 'bout it?

[ His arms are open!! come to him. Look at him, all open and trusting when it isn't his life on the line. ]

...Fine.

[ Wow, persuasive. And clearly he's so enthusiastic. Look at that scowl. ]

But then you have to do it, too.

[ He's not gonna be the only one acting like a child here. Parity seems fair; that's the theme, after all.

He gives Karma a lingering suspicious look, then turns around, back towards him. This feels ridiculous. But indeed, there's something primal about this game, some visceral flinch, that keeps him frozen momentarily, checking over his shoulder nervously. He doesn't like this. He doesn't trust this guy. But he's going for it anyway. And even if he faltered a couple times at first, hitching before the leap of faith, after a moment Zuko loosens up and closes his eyes (maybe a bit tightly) and falls backwards towards Karma's open arms. ]

[ Insistence can be persuasive, not that he has to try very hard when both of them know the tent flaps are sealed until they can get this done, and the fastest way to escape is to play along. Again, this is a very convenient situation for Karma who just smiles behind Zuko's back, gives him a flippant ] Sure, sure~ [ that may or may nor hold much water, but the promise can wait.

The smile is still on Karma's face when Zuko glances backwards— seems to widen a little at the fact that he does glance back, as if Karma would have moved to not being in range to catch him at all.

The moment Zuko lets himself fall backwards, he can hear Karma take a step back, obvious in the way he lets Zuko hear. His head passes chest height where he might have expected Karma's arms to reach under his armpits and catch him, and keeps falling, past his waist, nearly flat on his back about to hit the ground—-

but instead of the ground, he lands on what feels like thick cords of rope, dry and scaly and when he opens his eyes it's to the sight of seven snake heads bowed over his head, the rest of the naga's body curled beneath him to form a cushion between him and the ground. ]

[ Zuko feels the visceral stomach drop of falling the very second he passes where Karma's arms should have caught him, noticing the timing to the fraction of a second, but it's too late. His hands instinctually reach out beside him to catch his fall; his quick thinking and budding magical reflexes as a bender — albeit no longer a firebender, thankfully in this case, but still a bender all the same, really — prompt him to produce a weak cushion of air above the ground to break the fall, but Karma's familiar beats him to it, the naga cushioning his fall with its own body as Zuko's small gust dissipates around it. Zuko wasn't expecting that; he was expecting to fall, but he wasn't expecting to be rescued. What kind of prank is this? He opens his eyes again, looking wildly around, but finds no words when he's stunned to see several snake faces peering at him from all around. What kind of prank is this?! ]

[ The kind of prank is the most childish one. Another face adds itself into the mix: Karma's, which is laughing at Zuko while he crouches next to the other boy's head. ]

What a nice expression~ Too bad you failed the trust fall, though!

[ He felt that gust of wind, even if his familiar ultimately displaced it before it could do its job. That sort of thing is healthy in a person, trust but with a backup plan in case things go awry, and the ability to save oneself. Trust points all around! Just none in Karma's favor. ]

[ None at all. Zuko glowers, grumbling, scrambling to his feet (with careful respect to the naga as he does, because what the fuck, best not to piss that thing off, probably?) and keeps none too cool about all this. ]

What?! I didn't fail the trust fall! You failed the trust fall! You failed to be trustworthy! What the fuck was that?!

[ The naga hangs around, all seven heads standing a little taller, clearly pleased by the respect it commands. ]

Aw, come on, I didn't let you fall! You gave up trusting me halfway!

I didn't trust you from the start!

[ Well, there's the problem, Mr. Reactive. Not that he'd been given much reason to, but still. Zuko's bristling. ]

And you gave up catching me halfway anyway— no, you didn't catch me, actually! That thing— what, your familiar? It caught me!

[ He points his finger accusatorially at the creature that had just helped him. Really he's accosting Karma, but it's still not polite to point. ]

You're so honest!

[ He appreciates that so much, it's funny. If only more people could be like this: open when upset, unafraid to be direct, so sooooo different than the Zuko he'd been sitting across from and having a silent staring contest what feels like ages ago.

That silent statue is somebody Karma couldn't trust, but a Zuko like this feels much more like a person now. ]

Pedantic, too. Aren't we bound to our familiars? This guy might as well be an extension of myself- who do you think called him here?

[ As if the naga would go out of the way saving people left and right if Karma couldn't be bothered to. The benevolence isn't quite there, nothing more than the irritated flicks of seven tongues in tandem at the rude pointing, but the creature seems otherwise indifferent to the scene before it. Its job is done; it sinks back to the ground, dissolving into the shadow around Karma's feet. ]

[ Oh, man, that last comments leaves Zuko speechless, a heated look frozen on his face. Karma has a point. He should have just assumed that, maybe. But Zuko's had a more complicated relationship with his own familiar, none too surprising. He stares at the other boy incredulously for a brief but hot second, but no retort comes. At last, he just turns his face away, glaring at Karma from the corners of his eyes sulkily. ]

...So? My familiar does whatever he thinks he should do.

[ That is to say, his familiar once intervened in a battle it knew Zuko would regret winning when his rage got the better of his logic, and knocked Zuko out of the way stop his attacks in order to protect him from himself... which ultimately looked like just protecting his opponent — who was actually his friend. Complicated, indeed; but his familiar knew what truly serves Zuko best, what the boy really intends and wants deep down, even through his haze of heightened emotions. That's because they are so bonded, but the situation is far too complex and private to explain that. Even without explanation of his familiar's strangely disguised loyalty, his cryptic summary of the creature's questionable obedience still speaks volumes about Zuko himself — because after all, their familiars are still extensions of themselves. Zuko reveals so much without even realizing how transparent he is. ]

Edited 2021-02-26 18:24 (UTC)

[ He sure does, and Karma is absolutely living for this, between how much he can learn from subtext alone, and how blissfully oblivious Zuko is— nobody can be like this on purpose. ]

...Like I said, an extension of the self. I bet you're the same way, doing what you think is right instead of blindly following the orders of others.

[ Despite, you know. Getting roped into this one-sided question-answer session and playing along with Karma's """trust fall""". ]

[ Zuko just glares, taken aback slightly. He doesn't like feeling seen like this. But strangely enough, maybe this observant quality in Karma could instill some trust, theoretically. Or something like that. Not really. ]

...Let's get on with it. What happens if we fail to sync well...?

[ Already he's dubious, but impatient and aggravated and a little embarrassed, so ready to move on from his fall from grace. ]

[ His answer is a shrug because he doesn't know and hasn't heard from anybody, but far from insisting that they do trust exercises until Zuko finds it in himself to trust Karma's shady self, he's curious about what happens if they don't sync— if anything, that's the more useful piece of information to have, when they're already told what's supposed to happen, and attempting this out in the field in an uncontrolled setting amongst strangers is something Karma expects to fail more often than not. ]

No big deal! We'll just keep doing it until you trust me! The whole point of this is to practice, after all, no pressure to get it right on the first try.

[ He picks up the face paint and dabs his finger in it. Come here, Zuko, Karma's going to paint a monocle over his good eye and give him a distinguished curly mustache. ]

I guess that's true... All right.

[ His words are some small comfort. Zuko hesitates at first, but steps forward toward the other boy, allowing him to do whatever with the paint. He's not suspicious until the fancy mustache, finding himself uncomfortable now to have a stranger's fingers all over his face; somehow under the nose is an intimate spot he never realized... He avoids eye contact, looking awkwardly upward with a soft scowl as the artist is at work, but figures there's no point in protesting whatever Karma decides to paint, since it's Zuko being the stick-in-the-mud who's supposed to be letting his guard down to this guy who's coming off as some nogoodnik. The power dynamic here is not ideal. ]

Edited (i couldnt resist wow i had to go make it) 2021-02-28 03:53 (UTC)

[ PLEASE USE THAT ICON IN SUBSEQUENT THREADS

Look at this display of trust! Or resignation. It's resignation. Either way, it's really something to be able to sit there and let Karma vandalize your face- he thinks he could have even drawn a dick or something and Zuko would've been none the wiser until they're back outside and it's too late.

Missed opportunities. ]

Alright. Now you do me, and then I'll cast the spell. And give me your consent that I can do whatever the hell I want with your body!

Edited 2021-02-28 03:54 (UTC)

...I really don't like how you said that.

[ Nothing bodes well. Nothing had boded well from the moment Karma sat down and stared at him. But especially those words get under his skin and he's having not just second thoughts, but third, fourth and fifth thoughts about this now. But indeed, resignation is key, and his only available avenue by this point. The paint is already on. He isn't quite as creative as Karma, still not fully aware what's on his own face anyway, so his makeup stylings are not so fun. He does a straight line down the center of Karma's face, along the bridge of his nose, even dragging paint down over the center of his lips, then does another straight line across the cheekbones, the lines meeting at the bridge of his nose once more. Even when he's so aggravated and untrusting, Zuko's first inclination isn't to get revenge by drawing something funny; he's not silly enough to want to get payback like that. He's a rigid kind of guy, clearly. But earnest. For better or worse. ]

There...

[ He sounds apprehensive but looks focused, deliberative, and absolutely ridiculous with his monocle and mustache wearing such a serious expression. ]

[ Ooh, cold wet paint on one's face really isn't comfortable, and Zuko has to cross Karma's nose not once, but twice. He would almost think of that as being petty revenge if he didn't suspect that a cross is just the simplest thing to draw that spans the entire face.

That done, he sits back down on the ground, staring at Zuko for a moment and the squeezing his eyes shut because there's no way he can meditate while looking at Zuko's ridiculous face.

At least meditation he takes seriously, sitting up straight, quiet. If this fails, he doesn't want it to be on him. ]

getting used to it, lit the fuse to it

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i'm DYING

me crying on plurk that zuko is one of karma's favorite three people here

i wish i could say zuko felt the same lmao

karma collecting one-sided cr

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sorry this took 5ever, i got stuck, but nu! we continue!

\o/

omg sorry for the late again, i swear i'm back in the saddle lol clean inbox!!!!