isleofavalon | I'm a man of three fears [Closed]

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I'm a man of three fears [Closed]

🧙 WHO: Gokudera Hayato and Naomi Kimishima
⚔️️ WHAT: Testing the limits of the collar after discussing it in this thread
🕒 WHEN: Early October... ish?
🗺️ WHERE: Walk-In clinic!
⚠️ WARNINGS: language? blood? I'll update as needed if it goes elsewhere, even in prose c:

[It's taken a lot of courage to show up to meet with Dr. Kimishima. Gokudera isn't nervous that she'll kill him or anything, but that he usually starts and ends his days thinking of the collar. This test reinforces what he fears... his own self-destruction and the inevitable feeling of failing those who care or are close to him.

But he put himself in this position.

He's not backing out now.

The doctor made it very clear to him that they're doing this because he wants to. Whatever helps her gain a better understanding of the dangers involved with the device, the better. Gokudera doesn't want it chopping off anything more than his head in the worst case scenario.

When he walks into the clinic, he looks bored, trying his best to maintain a cool inaccessibility to anyone who looks at him. He hasn't exactly seen what the doctor looks like, but has heard her. The teen approaches the front desk, clears his throat perhaps to dismiss some awkward nerves.]

I'm here to see Doctor Kimishima.

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[Though the front receptionist gives Gokudera a look when he approaches, at the mention of 'Dr. Kimishima', they almost nod solemnly. Something about it almost says 'good luck', but what they say is he just needs to wait a moment while they inform the doctor he's arrived.]

[Naomi herself hasn't seen Gokudera before, but a patient's a patient and she knew his voice by now. If someone attempts to cut in front to take is appointment time like had happened earlier that day, there would be problems. Easy to say she might look a bit stern when she arrives at the waiting room after being called in her office. Usually it's a nurse that would get her patient, but not taking chances.]

Gokudera?

[Gokudera doesn't feel like he needs luck, and just assumes that the nurse has seen to a lot of Kimishima's patients. Is she a difficult doctor to work with? The family doctor appointed to caring for Gokudera was a pervert and an assassin. He's only nervous about the collar, not about the doctor.

And when she moves into the waiting room, he stands and gives a slight bow.

Look, he can be a rude young man sometimes, but this isn't exactly some routine check-up.]

Doctor?

[He approaches, body tense. Gokudera is habitually slouching and his nerves tight, as if he anticipates a fight at any moment or at all moments. The doctor was really spot on about him being paranoid.]

Thank you for seeing me.

[Looking him over - seeing the collar - and hearing him speak, that's enough to verify that before her was indeed Gokudera so she can lighten up a bit. Though, she did keep her arms crossed.]

You're welcome.

Follow me; we'll speak in my office.

[And close the door so no one became too curious if they started hearing things. When the time came, they would go to an OR proper, but for now, a little mess in her own room would be fine.]

[Gokudera doesn't have any reason to believe this is anyone other than Doctor Kimishima, and so nods his agreement and follows her into the office. There's no tension in how he moves, the only nervousness visible is in his gaze.

The boy moves to have a seat where he does his best to relax, ready to answer questions or allow her to get a better look at the device around his neck.]

Do you want me to try to take it off and we time it? Or do you want to so you can see the pressure required? It’ll act differently depending on whether it’s me, someone else, or something foreign.

Edited (There we go that’s more engaging c:) 2021-10-10 00:31 (UTC)

[With the door closed and him sitting, Naomi can indeed finally take a look at this collar. It's definitely not the most advanced thing she's seen, but it did look like a normal leather collar. And it would respond to a fingerprint of his 'owner' were it not malfunctioning. In fact, knowing that it was acting up just attested to quality, and that it could be removed in other ways.]

[Hm... She wonders if they could make it destroy itself; perhaps some magical interference on the collar itself, or protective magic that protected Gokudera instead while it attempted to harm him. Might be less complicated than trying to keep the collar from shrinking with him.]

[Taking out her phone, she'll switch over to a timer.]

Is it more or less harmful in response to outside forces? I could attempt first if not; otherwise, you should try taking it off first so I can time it.

It’s used to me adjusting it. And it doesn’t respond at all if the chain is pulled tight… only the leather.

[Gokudera has no idea how complex the collar is, or if it really works with an implant in him.

He won’t dismiss anything she says, and reaches up to the chain, tugs it. It can’t get very tight. Then, he moves his hands to the leather. There’s a small light beneath his fingers. It dulls away and then he glances at her.]

On your mark?

And attempts to break the chain have resulted in?

[Because if it didn't respond to the chain, they could just cut that and pull it off...]

[Well, it looks like he'll do it. And as he said, the collar doesn't do anything in response to the chain. However, his hand moves. She raises her phone.]

3, 2, 1... pull.

The same thing it does when you try to break any of it, it starts to cut in.

- ‘kay

[The links on the choke chain look thin, as if they retract into the leather.

When Gokudera pulls up, it’s as far as the chains allow. It’s not wide enough to make it over the swell of his throat just beneath his chin. Then they seem to vanish, tightening link by link on either end until the leather is the only thing visibly squeezing into his skin.

He can’t tug it down to ease it, and has to work his fingers out to spare them. The collar continues to shrink and he’s leaning back, trying to school his expression into something less pained, maybe just… mildly bothered. It’s kind of hard to play off the inability to breathe.]

So only tampering...

[She's curious how it might know the difference.]

[Still, watching Gokudera begin to 'remove' the collar, she raises an eyebrow as the chain begins to 'vanish' and squeeze into his skin. The timer's running while she watches this, not so much looking up at his face. It took about ten seconds for someone to pass out, brain death could begin at four minutes, but it's the cutting part that really complicates the removal.]

[Without any further attempt at removal, it stops restricting and simply stays at a nearly harmful tension. It's as if running checks for interference or continued removal. Gokudera knows it only gets like this if he attempts to actually remove it or twist the chains too much, or have it scan anyone else's fingers. It made him jumpy during the last tournament he was in, when the collar had him in so much pain he collapsed. The medics clearly say it was doing something wrong, and just a helping hand had him even more messed up when he came back around.

So, he's trying to breathe and stay calm, his neck red, as if it has done some damage to the skin. Like he'd said, it's not electrocution. It hurts, and there may be some future bruising.

Whatever she needs to find out, Gokudera's waiting, but he's not really in the moment as everything fades out and he goes fully limp in the chair. Good thing he leaned back. If the collar is letting up, it's doing so very slowly, not completely cutting off air flow now that there is no longer any tugging.]

[When he goes completely limp, Naomi looks at her timer. About the time she expected since he'd been trying to breathe, and looking back, it seems like it was gradually letting up. How slow? Too slow, but he didn't have to worry about brain death. Only once it seems to have let up enough (her timer still counting down how long that nonsense takes) does she finally cast a healing spell his way to get rid of the red mark. He's probably had enough of seeing those.]

[Now would be a matter of waiting for him to come to.]

[It doesn't take long for him to come back, a few seconds more and his throat doesn't hurt too badly. Usually it does, but it's more a blood choke than a full air choke. The boy rubs at his throat and the collar rotates easily with the press of his hand, not hooked on anything, or stuck in any one position.]

Oh... Did it help?

[He hopes the doctor was able to gather whatever information she needed from that example. Gokudera has no idea how long it's been, and now that it's at least been two minutes, the collar is no longer squeezing him out. It should be loose enough for him to fit his fingers back under, the length to the choke chain returned.

Gokudera coughs gently and sits up straight, glances over at her.]

Edited (alright that's better ^^;) 2021-10-10 04:49 (UTC)

[Hm... she makes a mental note of how the collar doesn't seem to react at this time.]

Yes, it did. I healed your neck, by the way. I'm sure you didn't want that mark.

[Again, he's fiddling around with it without issue right now. It's possible it couldn't handle multiple responses at once, or considered this a cooldown time since he was recovering which would mean it was monitoring his vitals somehow. If they purposely did that before shrinking him... yes, this might work.]

It wouldn’t be anything new. [He says so dismissively, then frowns.]

Thanks [Nice save, Gokudera]

[She’s right that it’s monitoring his vitals, and the length of the choke chain grows until it’s at an idle length, comfortable enough, but tight enough to stop it from being pulled up and off.]

Any thoughts?

It seems the collar didn't react while it was returning to its previous state after you came around so we may have a brief window of opportunity.

[She doesn't let the dismissive attitude bother her. He's been living for this for some time; it wouldn't be a peculiar response.]

Going about this with as minimal outside interference as we can will be optimal so long as you're prepared.

Brief opportunity to do what?

[He’s usually so rattled by dealing with it, he doesn’t attempt to take it off, wouldn’t because he knows it will just act worse. Gokudera has helped in the removal of pet rings before. Usually it results in amputation.]

I think I’ll just have the collar supported with kinetic magic, then use the shrinking potion on myself without getting it on the collar. That way I shrink and it can’t hurt me. From what I’ve learned, the potion is not instantaneous, but it won’t be acting on the collar, so I doubt any kind of sensor would be tripped.

And? If a sensor is tripped, which would it consider? That it's you tampering with it or an outside force is?

[Maybe it wasn't built to detect magic, but wouldn't it react the moment he became smaller? It seemed to settle on his neck with so much space that if it became looser it might react.]

Depends on how it’s tripped. What Pet Rings I’ve helped remove didn’t restrict and cut in. It was fast, like the cutting happened from the inside out. If this were a normal ring, cutting off the finger would not deactivate it. After a while, it stops. Maybe because it can’t read vitals or… the owner deactivates it because the pet is dead…

Do you want to tamper with it? You can…

[Gokudera figures if he shrinks fast enough, the collar won’t be able to catch up. Worst case scenario… he’ll still get it off. But that’s at the cost of his life.]

To see how it responds. I’ve not let anyone mess with it at all, but I know you aren’t looking to take my head off.

[And if she were, then it could easily be excused as an accident.]

... So if the collar were to assume you died too...

[There would be two death mages overseeing this... No, no, she would make this a separate plan. Still, it is possible...]

Do you think any magic here could possibly stop or slow the cutting if it was to respond that way?

[These were things to consider, but as for the tampering, she shakes her head.]

No. I'd prefer to avoid accidentally decapitating you. Though, Emet-Selch and I did discuss seeing about tethering your spirit back if it comes to that.

If you're thinking of suggesting I fake my death through magic, I've had a potion that did that. Emet told me it reacted, though I'm not sure how. He didn't try to remove it.

It was a potion called Living Dead.

[Gokudera hates that for every loophole Naomi's questions prod for, there is no give. Not a thing he hasn't tried. He isn't trying to shoot her down, but her ideas may have as much success as the one he has planned.]

The trauma to the damaged tissue I've seen when helping remove collars on that world, it seems to sever beneath the pet ring. The pet ring doesn't typically cut in. I think it cutting is more a warning.

[He nods, grateful she wants to avoid that.]

Tethering my spirit back? To... what? And how?

It would be less magical, more medical. The only issue is we would be attempting to avoid any cell deterioration, but healing magic might be able to do that... and once the collar's off, a second shot will restart your heart.

[Though, she wonders what this potion did that still set off the potion. As for the collar, it's proving to be an interesting puzzle.]

Hm? Your body? What else? We'll only have seconds to do it, but we might be capable of pulling it off. Eve should be more than capable of helping with that too.

A shot to kill me, and another to bring me back...?

[Gokudera gulps audibly and he's suddenly very worried. What if the pet ring cuts his head off anyways?! He's never tried to rob a ring from another pet before. Like a self destruction programmed to protect his and his owner's information. He could see that as a sort of... security measure.]

I'd have to be dead for long enough, but I've never tried to remove a pet ring from a corpse. As far as I know, it's impossible.

[He's not trying to dismiss her idea, but he also hadn't considered... strategic medically induced death.]

I'll be honest. I know next to nothing about Death Magic.

[Gokudera admits this, then gives her a cautious smile. Talking about his ignorance feels lighter than talking about a possible temporary death to avoid permanent death. What if he can't even actually die on this world and just comes right back?]

Have you uh... any experience with any dead off-worlders? Met any that have died and came back?

It would induce cardiac arrest, yes.

[She's actually been through it herself, but not for pet collar purposes. Hm, maybe it reacted in a self-destruct manner with this potion? Who knows.]

Seems pointless to keep a collar affixed to a corpse. Though, if they were interested in doing that, I would be a bit concerned.

[Because she can only think of why and it's not pleasant.]

It's fine if you don't. Death Magic is what you might expect with an unfortunate side effect of a discomforting aura each time it's used.

[Which might even unsettle nurses working at front desks...]

No, I haven't yet. Have a number of off-worlders died here that I should be aware of?

If the collar were to retain information regarding the owner, I could see why it would self destruct rather than stay…

[But would it take his neck with it?]

Not that I’m aware of…

The world that had this collar on me, Amoi, I never knew where the dead went. There were never any children born. It just seemed like the place was made of only transplanted people. I once saw a vehicle after a wreck spill out bodies…

I don’t know what happens here.

[Gokudera has a distant expression, something soft and haunted in his tone.]

Hm... if it has the space to retain that information I suppose. The typical collar would have the owner's name and return address at minimum, but that's not necessarily anything worth putting a self-destruct sequence in. Unless someone could access more data - find the device which monitors your vital readings...

[Stuff that was out of her hands, but the Little Guy could do that. But maybe that was why it was malfunctioning. Another world, the address was nonexistent now, but would it know by a tracker then?]

... Hmph, well, you're not about to be the first to find out. Understood?

I'm sure it does. That information is also available with a retinal scan. It could be used to incriminate a wealthy Elite trying to overthrow the government or something in Tanagura. My owner wasn't like that, though. He just had the collar on me so that I wouldn't get harassed so much. The other functions were dormant until I went to another world.

I never even knew it could be this bad... never considered I could go to another world, or that it would stay on me. Even after dying once before, I woke up and it was back, as if it were programmed to return, or whatever power was used to bring me to that world identified it as a necessary part of me.

[Gokudera looks on at Naomi, blinks at her, and the worry doesn't leave his face. He's already accepted that he may be the first. It's fine.]

I don't mind if I am.

If it means that there can be more knowledge gained in this world, or that I can find my freedom.

[He can only think of how sorry he is that his boss knows about this, has to worry about him. Gokudera's a failure as his right-hand, and has brought him nothing but trouble. He's been trying to get better, but even after time away where he should have learned how to take better care of himself, he's ended up like this.

The boy takes a deep breath, sits up straight. He'll get through this.]

Whatever you think is best, doctor... I'm on board.

[She'll... let him talk on because this is all information worth having, but she doesn't think they'll encounter another collar like this while in Avalon. And if they did, she has notes on how to deal with it... and takes down this 'Tanagura' name in case it comes up too. He probably wouldn't divulge more about this world in case anything's repeated so she may ask another if they're familiar.]

... Yes or no were your options in that answer.

[Because honestly, if he goes in worried this might fail, that drops the moral of others.]

Good to have you on board. But now I'll ask: do you want to die?

[There is another person who has been on Tanagura, but Gokudera would rather that person not be bothered. He would repeat or answer questions about that place. Whatever may help, honestly.]

Oh. I understand. [So... yes?]

[Gokudera worries too much, but he doesn't mean to think of the morale or his effect on it.]

No.

That's a last case scenario.

Better.

[But it's obviously something to work on.]

Good. Remind yourself that's your answer, and carry it with you into the operation. Patients that hold a positive outlook to their own procedures have higher chances of pulling through.

I will be trying to do all in my power to make sure you don't die from this, whether by magic or if I must step in and operate by hand. Meanwhile, I'll make sure whomever else helps is aware of my expectations of them as well.

Everything is going to be fine. I’m not going to die. I don’t want to die…

[He can repeat that until he believes it. Easy. It’ll take the place of his daily affirmations.]

I can simply tell my friends who won’t be helping directly that I’ve got an… operation scheduled with you. But for those involved: Midoriya, Ochako, and Emet… go ahead.

Alright... though, I've already spoken to Midoriya and told him I need him to be calm in the room. Hopefully he'll get some rest before that day so I'm not dealing with someone passing out.

[He seems like the type who would to her.]

Honestly, I need Midoriya to get Ochako to help. Midoriya wants to help... the same way my boss and my best friend do, but if you think he may not be able to keep calm, maybe he needs to wait with them.

I'm more concerned that Ochako won't want to help. I mean... she doesn't even like me. [Gokudera doesn't like himself. Anyone else want to join the club?]

But it's not like she'd want me to die. I can't see Midoriya befriending someone who would...

[Maybe he should make an announcement on the network about his operation, and then just go. That way his friends can be there to support him or... to lend a hand to Doctor Kimishima or Emet should they need it. Aside from the anxiety about ~~possibly~~ dying during the procedure, he's wondering if he should make amends, worried about current relationships and weighing how badly he'll leave those he cares about.

Not good thing to think about. Gokudera closes his eyes. I'm not going to die. I don't want to die. I'm not going to. Even if I deserve it. I don't deserve to die, and I'm not going to, and I don't want to.]

I'll evaluate him before anything starts.

Hm, if she doesn't want to help, we can see about getting someone else. Why do you need her aid specifically?

[Also, she'd prefer maybe he didn't do that...? To avoid a crowded room or theater, but if he did, she might have to post guard. If he's worried about one person not liking him, she can only imagine who else didn't like him here, and to what degree.]

I know her kinetic magic is strong. I've fought her. And... [Wow this feels cowardly] I need to make amends with her. Maybe if... I mean, when I recover from this and I'm alright, I will get a chance to talk to her and make things right.

[Gokudera, putting your life in the hands of a person you need to make up with over a disagreement is probably not the best move. But if he's grateful to be alive and free, he may be less inclined to harbor such anger towards her.

He's not a great guy, but he also doesn't want to burn a bridge.

He gets into disagreements, not really making enemies. The last one of those he made is gone now. Gokudera can't assure her that no one will try to cause his death, because there is no such person to his knowledge, and she did not express that concern to him.]

Edited 2021-10-13 03:07 (UTC)

[He's right, she doesn't think it's a good idea and even gives him a hard eye. Still, if she had proficient kinetic magic and it could help, she sighs.]

Fine. Just get Midoriya to have her contact me if she agrees to help. I need to be certain of her help myself. I will have her replaced if I think she may compromise the operation.

[Gokudera is at a bit of a loss. Maybe the doctor knows proficient kinetic mages? Still, he knows he has to make some attempt to reach out. These are the wrong circumstances in which to do so, but he lacks any sort of emotional intelligence.]

Alright, I’ll tell him to.

[Less that she knows someone and more that she'll see that they cooperate... if she's up for it.]

Alright.

Well, what day do you want to do this?

[Gokudera hopes he won’t have to explain to Ochako how important the role he’s giving her is… that even if they’ve fought, he hopes she doesn’t wish death for him.]

Later in this month or early in November. I don’t want my boss to be stressed about the procedure.

Hm... let's aim for early November. I'm a little busy with new patients turning up with missing organs lately.

[She only glances over the quests that normally appear.]

...

[Gokudera saw the quest. He still doesn't believe people are actually doing something like that. It's so stupid!]

Is that a willing thing? Or... are there organ thieves?

[He's been abducted before, and someone tried to take his heart. The bomber has... issues with this. But it's totally different if people are just... selling their own organs.]

Some, but there are a few coming to terms with a reality where an organ was stolen. Still, both need to be consulted to cut back on certain activities depending on what was removed.

[Though, she would be looking into what could be done in order to replace those fraudulently taken.]

I've met plenty of people who have had their organs stolen. Most died and came back... some escaped. But that was.... sort of a large group of people, probably er- hopefully not as many patients as you've seen.

[What if this develops into something horrible, like a giant organ-stealing fae monster? Or... one that steals hope? Gokudera's pondering this, letting his theories snowball and jump around.]

Do you think there are other Giants? Like maybe there's a lake Giant for Camelot, or er... elemental or magic-based ones?

I doubt it's the same number of people you've encountered.

[Which is a good sign for the situation considering... still...]

Could be. I'd think asking the fae may yield and answer considering this world is their construct. Still... hm, on the topic of fae, it is the harvest season. I wouldn't be surprised if these organs being taken were being used for a ritual.

[She feels like she read some story that mentioned faeries, Halloween, and a sacrifice once to Alyssa as a bedtime story. Mmm... no, the name wasn't coming back to her right now.]

[He knew that, but it's nice to hear her say so. Comforting. He never ever ever wants to go back to that world.]

An organ harvest... That does sound like something that would happen in this world. I'm not getting involved in any rituals if I can help it.

[Even if the ritual is a good thing, his trust has been damaged by what he knows happened during their most recent.]

At this point, agreed...

[She hasn't even been here long, but they're still feeling the affects of whatever made this all happen. The people of this world? The could do as they'd like, but stop asking otherworlders to join in without details.]

Anyway, we're done for now. If you have any concerns or questions, contact me.

[He nods at her, glad they see eye to eye. It's better to stay informed, and he's grateful he'd not participated in the ritual that set off what happened to Lestari and Celliwig. Still, he won't want to take up too much of her time. Now she has people with missing organs to see to as well as refugees.

Gokudera gets up and holds his device, folding his arm up some and giving her the smallest bow. He doesn't usually bow to anyone aside from his boss, but this... everything about their interactions dictates he must. It's the least he can do.]

I will. Thank you again.

[Bowing... that's so weird for her to get. It's been years honestly. She'll nod back to him at best.]

You're welcome. Take care of yourself...

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I'm a man of three fears [Closed]

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