[Darin's jaw locks as his misdirected anger gets sapped away from Allura brazenly calling him out. He can't hide what he's doing. What he tried to do even when he was transformed.]
[As the facade cracks he grits his teeth, desperately trying to hold himself together. But he's never been able to hide his emotions in his eyes.]
What do you want from me, Allura...?
Avalon was my last chance.
[He pulls his glasses off and wipes at the moisture beginning to accumulate in his eyes.]
I've spent my entire life being told I was a monster. Being told...being told that I'm the reason I don't have a place in my world. That being born is what killed my mother. That existing is what murdered my family. I've had rocks thrown at me. I've watched the church tell the world to live in fear of my coming and then I watched half the world do exactly that while the other half proclaims I don't exist.
Avalon was my escape. No one knew what I was here. No one knew what I could do. I didn't have to endure the looks. People shielding their children from me. Closing doors in my face. I didn't want much! I just wanted a place where I could live alone and maybe help some people.
But I couldn't escape it...[His voice catches in his throat as he stumbles back and leans on his workbench, his legs unable to support him under their own power anymore.]
It didn't matter where I went...I still become my greatest nightmare. I showed this world a monster.
[He gestures out his window to the ruins of lowertown.]
I hurt people, Allura...and I remember each and every second of it. I was in there.
[With tears streaming down his face, he looks her in the eye.]
I've spent my entire life trying to hide who I was. I pretended to be someone confident. Someone people would like. I pretended to act like how my brother would to give his memory life. And in all of that time I never figured out who I wanted to be. All I know...is that I hate myself. I always have.
So please...just...let me go. Take your kindness and warmth...and give it to someone who deserves it...
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[As the facade cracks he grits his teeth, desperately trying to hold himself together. But he's never been able to hide his emotions in his eyes.]
What do you want from me, Allura...?
Avalon was my last chance.
[He pulls his glasses off and wipes at the moisture beginning to accumulate in his eyes.]
I've spent my entire life being told I was a monster. Being told...being told that I'm the reason I don't have a place in my world. That being born is what killed my mother. That existing is what murdered my family. I've had rocks thrown at me. I've watched the church tell the world to live in fear of my coming and then I watched half the world do exactly that while the other half proclaims I don't exist.
Avalon was my escape. No one knew what I was here. No one knew what I could do. I didn't have to endure the looks. People shielding their children from me. Closing doors in my face. I didn't want much! I just wanted a place where I could live alone and maybe help some people.
But I couldn't escape it...[His voice catches in his throat as he stumbles back and leans on his workbench, his legs unable to support him under their own power anymore.]
It didn't matter where I went...I still become my greatest nightmare. I showed this world a monster.
[He gestures out his window to the ruins of lowertown.]
I hurt people, Allura...and I remember each and every second of it. I was in there.
[With tears streaming down his face, he looks her in the eye.]
I've spent my entire life trying to hide who I was. I pretended to be someone confident. Someone people would like. I pretended to act like how my brother would to give his memory life. And in all of that time I never figured out who I wanted to be. All I know...is that I hate myself. I always have.
So please...just...let me go. Take your kindness and warmth...and give it to someone who deserves it...